Moments of Musing

This month, start living your best life

Filed Under: life, perspective, positivity //


How is Halloween over and November already here? I feel like I blinked and life fast forwarded itself. 

Ah, life. 

This month, no matter the ups and downs and all arounds–live it. Live every experience fully and freely. Don’t let the negatives creep in and overtake the positives. Don’t “woe is me” your days away. 

Let’s take my life, for example. I’ve had people call it a “fairytale” and while it’s semi-flattering, it’s also a little offensive when expressed a certain way. Yes, I’m aware I have an amazing husband and a beautiful baby boy. I am blessed BEYOND belief and I’m so in love with both of them. I would not do anything differently. 

But my life is not picture perfect. My marriage is strong but there are days when my husband and I strongly disagree. My son is the best thing to ever happen to me but his newborn days were (mostly) sleepless, difficult and yet overwhelmingly happy. Work is tough but I’m lucky to have a job I enjoy and the understanding coworkers I do. 

It’s all about perspective. Even if you don’t like this season in life, make the most of it. Don’t discount your own successes or life experiences because someone else’s seem better. If I did that, I could go on and on about whether we have enough–money, space, time, so on and so forth.  

And still, even though my life is far from perfect, I have to pinch myself because none of the imperfections matter when the loves of my life look at me. We’re doing the best we can and I think we’re kicking butt at it. We’re just living the best life we can right now. 

You deserve to do the same. 

Autumn’s Darkness

Filed Under: life, optimism, perspective, positivity //

We’re often so excited for fall that we forget the clocks jump forward. The days are shorter. The nights are longer. The sun goes down earlier. The dark arrives sooner. With it, autumn brings increased darkness.  
The darkness creeps in slowly at first. It’s barely recognizable and then it seems like all of a sudden, the dark hours arrive sooner and sooner. It’s hard to remember what it’s like to get out of work during daylight, to wake up during daylight, to arrive home during daylight. All of that suddenly happens in the dark. 
But while the darkness has certainly crept in, we mustn’t forget that light shines brightest in the dark. It’s most visible there. It stands out more. You know, the light never really goes away. 

It might be harder to find or take longer to get to or be more work than you want to put in, but the light is always there–if you just look for it. 


If we go on a coffee date

Filed Under: life, life lately //


I’d probably tell you that I gave up coffee during my pregnancy (except a frappucino I had) and now indulge in it a bit less. 
I’d most definitely speak about our baby Sebastian and how amazing he is, how much he’s changed since birth and how bittersweet that is. 
I’d tell you motherhood is no walk in the park (despite how many literal walks in the park I’ve taken with him) but that it is my dream come true. He is my dream come true. 
I’d divulge that I have mixed feelings that it is September and almost fall. I love the cool weather and the fun activities this time of year brings but (and it’s a BIG but) I’m sad my maternity leave ends this season. 
I’d let you know that I’m living in the present more. Sure, I daydream of next year’s Disney World vacation and a Santorini vacation sometime after that but for now, I’m loving the everyday joys. 
I’d be excited to share with you that I’m planning Sebastian’s Baptism, which I’m excited for. It felt surreal going to the Baptism parents class… and I just hope we both fit in our outfits.

I’d say thank you for your time and company!

Sobriety

Filed Under: life, sober //

There are a lot of things that happen in life that are out of our individual control. On the other hand, life is also made up of many choices. In August 2013, I made a difficult choice (cold turkey)… and I haven’t looked back since. 

I CHOSE SOBRIETY. 
Now, don’t go feeling bad for me, thinking that I no longer have fun or know how to enjoy life. That is, in my opinion, the biggest misconception about sobriety. Trust me when I tell you–in addition to deciding to become a parent and having my son; marrying my husband; and attending Penn State and law school; it was one of the best decisions of my life. 
It wasn’t an easy decision but it was necessary and doing what’s necessary is very often difficult. Though brought on by negativity, I made the conscious decision to turn sobriety into a positive life event. After all, it has taught me so much. 

I know how to be a leader. Before, I’d join the crowd in slinging drinks back. I’d try keeping up, only to (very often) surpass all others. I was a follower and in doing so, I’d embarrass myself and sometimes those around me. I’d get into unwarranted arguments. I’d disappointed myself and loved ones. Most times, I wouldn’t remember a thing after a certain point. (I thought that was pretty standard, that everyone “blacked out” almost every time they drank. I’ve since learned it is not nor is it safe.) Now, I do my own thing, along with Tim if he’s with me since he’s also been sober since August 2014! I follow my own healthy, happy lead and I have fun doing so. I am not ashamed of being sober (though, admittedly, I used to shy away from divulging that I am) — I am proud to be. 

I used to think (mostly in college) that I needed to drink to have fun. I’d even judge others who didn’t drink or drank very little. As an adult, I’ve come to the responsible realization that I don’t need alcohol to have fun. In fact, I enjoy my time more now. I can dance to my favorite song and still feel on top of the world. I can have a great night out with friends and make memories that I’ll remember forever. 
Choosing not to drink alcohol is a decision I make whenever I am confronted with it, which is often. I am an expert at exercising self control in this aspect. Whenever I am out to eat and I am told of the drink specials, I choose to pass them up. Whenever I go out to bars or clubs, I choose to drink water or soda. Whenever I think about pre-sober me having a glass of wine following an exhausting day, I choose to indulge in coffee instead. 
I now know how to live my best life. I have much fewer apologies–neither to myself nor others–to make. I am safer and can take care of myself. I do not have to rely on others to make sure I get home, to keep “creeps” away, to make sure I don’t fall and hit my head, to carry me. Now, I can rely on myself and that feels so good and so liberating. I live a much healthier lifestyle, void of excruciating hangover headaches and episodes of dry heaving. I can wake up early after a night out and do house work, watch the sunrise or go for a run. Simply waking up early and energized after a night out feels amazing in itself. I certainly don’t take it for granted. 
If given the chance to go back in time and have life pan out differently, I’m not sure I would want to. I truly believe God brought me through the tough times to teach me how to love myself and my loved ones better… and to get me sober. 
These days, I celebrate my life. I no longer resent the reasons I am sober; I am actually grateful for the journey that brought me here. I always knew I would have to cut back on or eliminate my alcohol intake and thought it’d probably happen when I had kids. I thank God it happened much sooner. 
After all, I have no doubt that sobriety has made me a better parent, partner, friend, lawyer, family member… and person.

*If you or someone you know is struggling with alcohol abuse, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration Hotline at 1-800-662-HELP; or speak with a therapist or people whom you trust. It’s okay to ask for help –even the strongest people need it sometimes. 

Life lately… Post baby

Filed Under: Baby L, life //

Hi there! It’s been a little while since I’ve last been here so I figured I’d give an update:
Baby L is growing and growing. He amazes his daddy and me everyday with how perfect he is for us. He is literally our favorite person in the universe–don’t know how we ever did life without him💙
I recently had the chance to get my pedicure done while my cousin and Mr. L stayed with the baby. It was weird not to be with him and all I really wanted was a nap but it felt nice to take of something of myself. 
We threw my parents a surprise 30th Anniversary Party this past weekend and it was a hit. There were tears, laughter, good food and dancing (and everyone swooned over the baby)–what else could you want? Speaking of the party, I wore a red lace number and my wedding rings… Because they fit again!

The summer weather is in full swing and by that I mean it’s been hot hot hot. Perfect weather for fresh pineapple, though. It’s my favorite fruit and I didn’t eat much of it during my pregnancy due to the myth that it could soften your cervix …so I enjoyed “indulging” this past week. 
Well, tell me — what have you all been up to?