Moments of Musing

Still Here!

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As I was laying in bed last night listening to country love songs (I’m such a romantic, this I know) I realized I haven’t posted in the longest time I’ve gone without posting since Summer 2012. I don’t feel guilty about it, though, because it’s honestly being freeing not having to plan what I want to express. It’s nice to come here when I have something of significance, or at least substance to put on this here lovely blog of mine. Plus, life has kept me pretty busy these last few weeks. Since I’ve been MiA lately a few exciting things have happened:

1.  I have my abs (mostly) back. I won’t post my photo here but my lifting + 30-minute 500 calorie cardio workouts probably have something to do with it. I’ve not eaten the best the past week — a much needed Trader Joe’s trip is needed this weekend!

2. My cousin (who’s more like my sister)/ MOH was in town MDW and we had the greatest time. We were out and about everyday. We’ve missed each other a lot since I’ve moved so it was a much-needed us weekend! She also planned on buying me Loubies for the wedding (because she and her mom are crazy!!! and so giving) but I successfully stalled our shopping trip and I think I’ve convinced her to save the money because she’s spending more than enough on the wedding shower. Love that girl and her mom so much!

3. Tim’s EOS date might be really, really soon. Talk about SURREAL. If you’d have told me 3 1/2 years the time would go this quickly I’d probably tell you to STFU… in the nicest way possible 😉

4. The warmer weather seems like it is finally here to stay!!! Chicago in the spring is like a different city. Everyone was right. Oh, and living a block from the beach — I love it already. Sunday was spent at the beach and, aside from sunburn on skin I apparently missed with my sunblock, it was blissful. 

5. For those of you who don’t know me personally (even though you probably know more about me than the average person I meet …) you wouldn’t know I nap a lot. Like almost every evening after work. Well, the past few days I have not and it has felt like a huge accomplishment. I swear I’m an adult, really!

6. Wedding planning is still underway. Our photo booth is in the process of being booked. And more decor is in the process of being decided on and bought. Invites will be ordered shortly after T moves here.  Favors are still up in the air but we have time to decide!

Bad Allergies. Good Weather.

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I could pretend things are always dandy in my life and head but I’d be doing just that–pretending.

 
Because the truth is some days suck. Some days, like today, my allergies are bad when the weather gets nice, which just feels unfair. As a matter of fact, sometimes life seems unfair. 

Some days are harder than others. Some nights it’s harder to fall asleep. Some days, particularly Sundays, I miss Tim more than usual. Some days I cave and eat my emotions, but really that means I have a cheat snack–or 4. Sometimes I feel like I’m missing out on crucial family time for a career that is more than fulfilling but that can’t hug me or love me because that’s not what careers (/inanimate things) do. 

The thing about life, though, is that no matter how you’re feeling… It goes on. The seconds, minutes, hours, days, years–they pass whether you like them or not. So I allow myself to feel the cruddy moments but then I choose to quickly bounce back. I choose to enjoy as much of life as I can. I choose to relish in these moments. In my city living. In the nice weather. In my independent life. In my awesome career. In my amazing relationship with my fiancé. And in my loving relationships with family. 

Because guess what? Those days and nights and moments that downright suck… I’m sure they’d suck 100% more if I chose to dawn on them. 

http://faith0verfears.tumblr.com/post/83869690093/buthavenotlove-trying-to-remember-this-amidst 
 

Getting *More* Done

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Last night was spent in a nightclub (first time in forever for me) and a country bar–quite the nightlife spectrum, I know. So I’m happy to relax, while still being productive, today. It’s not 1pm yet and breakfast (almond flour pancakes) has been made and eaten, and my laundry is almost done. I’ve also gone on a little cupcake run to More. 

City living has turned me into a foodie!
 
I decided to make this Sunday  even more productive by participating in The Sunday Social, my first time since sometime last year!
1. Who do you call when you need to vent?
Timmy; my parents; brother; or some of my best friends (Trish, Luana, Fara).

2. Where do you go when you need alone time? 

When I’m living with Timmy and we get into a spat that isn’t resolved within a couple minutes, I go into a separate room and watch TV or read, or I go for a run.

3. What is your favorite alone time activity?
Lately, it’s been wedding planning. Working out. Cooking. Sadly, I don’t do as much reading anymore 🙁

4. What is something we should all stop and read right now?
I really enjoyed The Fault in Our Stars, which is coming out in theaters soon I think. You’ll definitely want to grab some tissues, though–it’s quite the tearjerker!

5. Who do you wish would read your blog that doesn’t already? Family? Celeb?  

Hmm T and my family and closest friends already do .. so I’d have to say a celeb or company that will pay me lots of money to blog 😉

6 months ago…

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Six months ago, this week turned out to be one of the most eventful weeks ever. On Monday, I made the move to Chicago. I was nervous, excited, anxious, scared. But I hugged and kissed my dad “see you later” and boarded the plane with my mom anyway. I didn’t know more than a handful of people here. I didn’t know my co-workers-to-be. I was not familiar with Chicago. But I made the move here anyway. 

On Thursday and Friday, I was sworn-in as an attorney and at my job. It was the proudest I’ve ever felt. To know all of my hard work finally really paid off. To know all of my tear-filled nights were for naught.  I was nervous and even a bit afraid about what my job would be like. I was nervous about the big responsibility I would have. Heck, I there are days when I’m still nervous or afraid. But I do it anyway. 

And then on Friday of that week I flew out to Las Vegas with my mom to meet Tim, my family and friends. He’d been acting a bit odd leading up to my arrival so I wasn’t sure what was going on. Less than six hours later I realized why that had been–because he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him later than night/in the wee hours of the morning. 

Getting engaged was exciting and emotional. I’d dreamt of and imagined getting engaged to him for a while but I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you that a part of me was and is nervous. Would I lose my independent identity once married? No more tv to myself, no more eating chocolate for dinner, no more napping every afternoon/evening after work … I am nervous because I’ve never been married. I’ve never been a wife–but I’m more excited than anything because I love Tim more than I could ever write in a blog post. Because I know a life with him will be a heck of a lot of fun, and fulfilling, and loving. Because we’ll learn what it’s like to be married and figure it out together. We’ve encountered a lot of obstacles together and we’ve helped each other push through each of them. I have no doubt we’ll do the same when married. I know it won’t be all rainbows and butterflies but I am more than ready to live life together together.  


Six months ago, this week was my “scariest” week yet. It was also my most exciting and the best one I’ve experienced. It’s been one heck of an amazing adventure since. 


Happy Where I’m Planted

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I finally remembered to tune in to CNN’s Chicagoland last night. In fact, I delayed my late-night workout just to watch it. And I’m so glad I did. It made me so proud to be living here, to do the job I do. In one scene, the police commissioner stated “Chicago is like Manhattan on a lake.” I couldn’t agree more. Except it’s cleaner, has less people… and a bigger gang problem. The comparison to NYC is what gave me the confidence to move to the new city, by myself. I loved the skyline and I loved walking around downtown when visiting. Surely, I figured, I could get accustomed to living here if I’ve lived elsewhere, especially NYC. 

These days, I’m proving myself more and more right. Though I still get pangs of homesickness and wish I had more family and friends here, I don’t regret the decision. It’s allowed me to grow professionally and personally exponentially–in ways I can’t even imagine otherwise. 

I choose to be happy about my move here because I would be selling myself short if I chose to mope. Instead of being sad of what or who I don’t have here, I choose to explore the city with new friends and coworkers. 
 
I can’t put my finger on “why” but I feel such a connected to this city in the six months (on the 28th) that I’ve lived here. One thing I know for sure is wherever life takes me next, I will never find another Chicago. I fall more in love with the city with each passing day.