“Window Shopping”
Lately with the stress of school and missing T, I have indulged in some online window shopping. That never hurt anyone, right? 😉 Here are some items that have caught my eye:
Gold Chain Link Bracelet |
Perspective.
I am 24 years of age. Sometimes when I think about how old, or young, I am, I feel like I should be engaged or married, buying a house and maybe have kids by now. But then, I stop and think. Really think. Let’s take today – I just left my law school registrar’s office for a graduation application appointment because I am graduating with my Juris Doctor in just 7 months. I scheduled a call-back interview for a full-time attorney job. I also have an upcoming interview and I’ve been on a few others. I am applying to jobs all over the country and I have a family and partner who support me in all that I do.
Would I have been able to do this all if I was engaged/married to T and potentially a mother? Possibly. But it would be very difficult, if not impossible at this time. When T learned of his PCS to Hawaii, he threw the idea of me going with him up in the air. But as much as we both would have loved to be together, we both knew I could not give up or put on hold my lifelong dream of becoming an attorney. It just wouldn’t have made sense (I think his getting out relatively soon also made it an easier decision to make). And now, over a year after the discussion during which we decided I had to stay in school and he had to go to Hawaii, we are better than ever. (Sure, we have ups and downs, but what healthy couple doesn’t?)
Ultimately, I am so happy with my decisions and the way my life has panned out thus far. Sure, I may not be getting married at 25 and having kids at 26 like I had hoped when I was a little girl and I might still get a little down on myself when I think about it BUT (God willing) I could be married just a little later and be able to hopefully become a successful woman that my kids will be so proud to call their mom. I will be the first person in my family to cross the stage at a graduate school graduation ceremony. And I will be the first attorney in my family. And all of this makes me feel so empowered at the age of 24 and okay that my life isn’t turning out exactly how I planned… because, in many ways, it is actually turning out better.
Tumblr Cameo
Below is a post from my tumblr… Timmy and I have been arguing a little but we always prevail. I think we’re just over this deployment and the months apart because of it.
HiS BOOTS, HER FLiP FLOPS… PERFECT FOR ONE ANOTHER.
Just like his combat boots, he’s rough around the edges. He has a strong personality. He swears just like the Sailor he is. He is stubborn. He can make me so mad sometimes.
Just like my flip flops, I am girly and carefree. I can be oversensitive. Sometimes, I nag. I like to get my way. I too have a strong personality. Most of the time, I think I am right. I can be bratty. I cry a lot. Overdramatic? Yep, I’m good at that too.
But he is the biggest teddy bear. He is so smart and he is so lovable. He has the biggest heart. He listens. He makes me feel more loved than I have ever felt. He makes me blush, I don’t remember the last time I blushed before him. He makes me promises and he’s kept those promises. He trusts me even with the distance and time difference. He respects me. He makes me feel beautiful. He treats me like the woman I am.
And he thinks the world of me. He loves me and the woman I am. He just stays quiet when I argue so the situation does not escalate. He holds me when I cry. He kisses me when I am upset or sad; he appreciates my emotional side. He lets me know when I am wrong and gives me credit when I am right.
We complement each other wonderfully; we’re perfect for one another.<3
I’m back, back from Cali, Cali …
And not happy about it. Especially because there were no palm trees lining the NYC streets like I’ve always wished there to be … and because school starts up again on Monday. California was really pretty, though. I enjoyed San Francisco but the LA area is definitely more my cup of tea.
I enjoyed being away… just as I always do. This vacation was a bit different than my last few, though. It was a family vacation. I still live at home, so you can imagine how rocky a family vacation can get. It started with some arguments on the way to the airport, at the airport, and when we arrived (woops!). But once we were there, it was great. I was pleasantly surprised. I am glad I got that family time, especially with my hardworking dad, because who knows how much longer I’ll be living at home.
The vacation was also a nice distraction from missing T. He’s almost halfway through with his deployment. WHICH means that we are almost halfway to the best month of the year (for various reasons)! I miss him all the time. But I’ve become accustomed to the distance. Sometimes it’s overwhelming. Other times, it feels like I saw him yesterday. I guess Skype, FaceTime, email, the phone, Viber, and Pair have helped enormous amounts (the latter two especially during his deployment).
Also please note: this is only my second post. I created the blog a while ago but just kept on with my tumblr and forgot about this. I posted in July, but then I deleted it because, again, I thought tumblr was all I need. I now realize that I’d like a place to just put my words. I’m still keeping my tumblr, which has also helped with the distance, but I am going to try to continue blogging on here, as well.
That’s all for now. Goodnight!
Xo,
J