Moments of Musing

Out with the Next, In with the Now

Filed Under: aloha //

Happy October! I receive bar results this month – nerve-wracking is a complete understatement as to how this waiting game feels. Let’s focus on the present, though — shall we?

Upon reading the article, 26, Unmarried, and Childless, the very last sentence jumped up at me and I invite all of the people in my life to do the very same thing: “[D]on’t ask me what’s next. Ask me what’s now.” 

 

 
Like the author, I do not have a husband. (I do have a great boyfriend.)
 
I don’t have kids. 
 
I currently do not have a career (…since I am still waiting for bar results).
 
But –on most days — I am over-the-moon-happy. And it’s a lot easier and feels a lot better to be happy when others recognize that I’m okay with not being married right now, I’m more than okay with not having children right now, and I am enjoying my life pre-career. Too often we think about what is coming. I’m guilty of it. I wonder “when will Tim and I get engaged and married?” There, I said it. I think about that. And I do think about when kids will come into the equation. And Lord knows I wonder everyday what my career will be [like] and whether I’ll be any good at it.
 
For now, however, I am more than happy with my kickass boyfriend. I am happy dating and exploring the world with T whenever we feel like it. That will all change when kids come, which we very much want. But for now, it’s us (sometimes 5,000 miles apart, which wouldn’t be feasible with kiddos) and we’re happy with that. And I am happy writing on my blog these days and expressing myself in ways that I never have and more than I ever thought I publicly would. I will eventually have a career – along with the many years of working that will probably come with it.
 
Sometimes, as much of a planner as I am, I like not thinking about the future. So I’m going to do less of it and live in the now. Embrace it. Appreciate it. Bask in it. Love it. All I really do have and know is now – so I won’t waste it worrying about the next thing that might never even happen. 
 
And when asked by someone about what’s next, I’ll simply explain what’s now.
 
—————————
 
Speaking of what’s now – 
 
I am SO excited to see an article of mine on SpouseLink.org. Check it out here: https://www.spouselink.org/blog/blogging-a-coping-tool!
 
Oh, and I just found out this morning – shortly after posting this – that I PASSED THE ILLINOIS BAR EXAM! Chicago here I (and Tim, next year) come!!!!!!
 
 

About Jacqueline Hernandez Lewis

Featured on Associated Press as a trailblazing Latina influencer and on Parents as a Latina mom to follow, Jacqueline Hernandez Lewis is a writer and content creator celebrating womanhood, motherhood and humanity. She also works for a NYC nonprofit dedicated to preventing domestic violence and promoting gender justice. Of all her roles, mom and wife are her favorite.

Comments

  4. AwesomelyOZ

    Hello Jackie!

    I am a newbie blogger and found you via MalSmiles Wildcard fun, I am trying to connect with fellow bloggers and feel you seem pretty awesome. 🙂 Congratulations on passing the bar exam, that is a GREAT accomplishment! 🙂 You will do fine and Mr. Tim will return before you know it! I have the same sentiment that blogging is an avenue that lets you express yourself and your interests, it's quite liberating. 🙂

    Take Care!
    -Iva

    Reply

  5. Jake

    New follower from the Blog Hop:) Congratulations on passing the bar! That is exciting!! I agree, focusing on the now is something that is hard to do, especially with all of society's expectations that seem to be one size fits all. Life works out at the moment it is meant to & in the meantime it's ok to enjoy the ride and the blessings at hand♥ I look forward to following along! http://angeloriantradition.blogspot.com/

    Reply

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