Fall is life’s lesson on the beauty of letting things go. In addition to a lot of old clothes, I am letting go of trying to balance everything and giving myself grace.
I write this as I am running late for work, yet again. I am grateful to work at a flexible organization that values me as an employee and respects my new role as a breastfeeding (this matters—I’ll explain why) mom to two.
Each morning I wake up early and pump. This takes anywhere between 15-20 minutes, plus time to wash my pump parts and pack my pump. I have to get ready and sometimes nurse R so he doesn’t drink a bottle right away.
Oftentimes, I speed walk or jog to the train. It’s my new workout routine.
Each afternoon, I am updated on the “milk situation,” that is whether there is enough milk for R. Depending on the status, I either rush home or stay at work until my normal time.
I do my work during my commute, while at work and sometimes at home. And I am a mom 24/7. That means I check up on the boys, schedule appointments and pump while I’m at work.
When I am home, I have to take care of the boys, laundry, dishes, dinner and so on.
When I am home, I have to take care of the boys, laundry, dishes, dinner and so on.
All of this is to say: There is no such thing as a work-life balance.
I am constantly doing something for work or my family or my home (at times simultaneously)… and oftentimes, I am forgetting something. Some days, I forget to switch the washer load into the dryer. Other days, I forget to return a phone call. The day before I wrote this post I’d forgotten to pump at work not once, but TWICE because work was hectic. By the time I realized, it was time for me to go home to relieve my mom.
I am always multi-tasking, as I know many other moms also are, which sometimes means I’m walking around tired and stressed.
As you know, though, I’m an optimist. I like to view everything positively. And so, I always give myself pep talks. Because the reality is that things are great. My parents are an amazing support system. My partner is very hands-on and involved with the kids and our home. And my kids are my world. When it comes down to it, I live a life I love with people I adore.
So, sure “work-life balance” is a huge crock. But that’s okay. While I’m tired and stressed, I am also proud to have a career I am passionate about and which allows me to contribute financially. I am blessed to be a mom and a wife and every other family role I have. And I feel fortunate to own the home that we do. I’m happy, I’m healthy, and I’m loved. That’s what matters most.
This is great, and I totally agree! I don't nurse anymore as all four of my kids are nearly grown, but I do understand the feeling of juggling way too much. I work at a large accounting firm now and even though my kids are older, it's still work, work, work, 24/7. I'm impressed with you, Mama! You sound like you are doing an amazing job.